I’ve written and re-written this post so many times. I’m not sure if it will be conveyed the way I hope, but please keep in mind I am eternally grateful I was able to get pregnant, have a great pregnancy, and deliver a healthy baby girl. I will never take that for granted. These are just my thoughts I’ve had about gaining weight while being pregnant that I do think others have had them as well.
The truth is, it was hard for me to gain weight during pregnancy. Not hard as if it was hard to do. It was hard that it was happening.
Before getting pregnant, I didn’t understand women who thought this. In fact, I know many times I would tell Aaron that I just didn’t understand how anyone had a hard time gaining weight since they were growing a baby and needed to get larger.
Then I got pregnant, and I watched my clothes get tight, my belly get huge, the scale go up. I had a hard time every single time I went to the doctor and had to be weighed. Do not get me wrong. I gained a good amount of weight for carrying a baby. Weight was never a worry from the doctor’s perspective. I’m just being honest and saying it wasn’t an easy thing to handle.
What’s harder than I thought, though, is after I delivered her, I still had a bunch of weight. I read that you’d look about 6 months pregnant after. I bought larger comfy pants. I bought tops that would cover it. I thought I’d be ok. But truth is, I wasn’t. The first week or two, I was. I know that I did bounce back very quickly, but it’s not my old body. I know my body will never be my old body since I had my beautiful daughter. But, it’s still hard to not have my jeans fit right.
Maybe this didn’t make sense to you. I’m sure if you haven’t had a child, you will not understand. I know I didn’t, and that’s ok! I would NEVER trade my daughter for anything right now or my body. It was able to push out Annabelle. It was able to bounce back and have me feeling good a couple weeks after delivery. It was able to carry her to term. It was able to have me up and running two and a half weeks after delivery. It has done amazing things. I just didn’t think I’d have a problem with looking in the mirror and still seeing flab. Obviously it took 9 months to happen that way, so it shouldn’t come off super quick. I have a journey ahead and have been working at it.
I know the flab will go away, the muffin top will disappear, and I’ll comfortably fit in my clothes again. I know it will happen in time, and that I need to be patient. I never thought I had self confidence issues prior to being pregnant, so I didn’t expect to feel this way at all. Somehow, it did, and there are times it’s harder than others. In the end, I guess it was just hard as a first timer. Next time, I will know what to expect while pregnant, and after. It doesn’t change my feelings towards Annabelle or being pregnant again. Just sharing this as a way for others who are going through it or may go through it in time, that it’s ok to feel that way. Your body is bringing you a beautiful gift- and I’ll never take that for granted!