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“Savor the moments, they go too fast”?
How many times have you heard this phrase? I’m sure a lot! It’s so true in many different ways, and for many different areas. Today, though, I wanted to talk about it with regards to motherhood. I hear this saying quite frequently when out and about, mostly from woman who have been there and their children have grown and aren’t little babies anymore. I totally get why they say it, but it’s hard for that to be true all the time.
Don’t get me wrong- I try really hard to savor the moments. Let’s be clear- I try really hard to remember the good times. It’s hard to savor the moments when there are tantrums, a day without a break, a baby crying in your ear, the toddler crying because the baby is loud and is touching you all.the.time. I will remember those moments, but I’m not savoring them. It just means something different between having your first born and second born.
When I had Annabelle, each stage was my new favorite. I loved seeing her explore the world, learn to roll, sit up , and see her personality shine. I also happened to love the newborn stage. I savored every moment with her, but I don’t remember each moment. I remember the milestones, the smiles, how happy she was. I know we had many hard times, but I don’t necessarily remember them all. That newborn stage? I thought I loved it, until it was with baby 2. Turns out, it’s great and easy to love the newborn stage when you have one baby. When you have two, it’s near impossible. Those middle of the night feedings (granted Nolan has been really good about that..)? They make it very hard to function with your toddler. The endless crying? Hard to occupy both kids and keep them both happy. Now that I know just how incredible life gets and how much fun babies are when they’re older, I find myself wishing time would speed up with Nolan, while slowing down with Annabelle. Then I try to stop myself. I know I am going to miss the rocking of Nolan. I’m going to miss the little things he learns and the excitement they cause.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that, yes, we need to savor those moments. But as a mom deep into the chaos that is two under two, it can be pretty freaking hard. There are so many days where I’m at the end of my rope and I can’t wait for them to be asleep. But then I find myself wishing for time to hurry so I can hold them and see them again in the morning. Motherhood. It’s a crazy thing. I dream of getting away and taking time to myself, and one random night when Aaron told me to go out, I found myself not even knowing what to do and when I left, I missed them so I came home. It’s a tricky thing. No matter the time between your two children, you’re faced with many obstacles. Or even if you just have one baby! Things are hard, there’s no way about it.
So while I’m over here savoring the moments, trying to not wish time away, grinning with the hard nights and lack of sleep, deep down, I do know I will miss these stages and will want them back at some point. Babies don’t keep, that’s for sure.
Moms, just know, if you’re in the same boat as me and wishing for time to speed up so you’re not in the sleep deprived, questioning everything, living in 3 hour increment schedules state, you’re not alone. But, as they say… savor those moments.